To Be or Not To Be

A little kingdom I possess,
Where thoughts and feelings dwell;
And very hard the task I find
Of governing it well.
-- Louisa May Alcott.
...........hmmm....that more or less describes my situation !!

~A Wise Man Said~

It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.
-- Aristotle

Monday, April 15, 2002
I had written something quite some time ago....felt like putting it up here today.....don't know why....

If there was a someone........

One grows emotional at times and wonders how it would be if one could pour forth all ones troubles, anxieties, fears and worries into the heart of another and find a responding chord.

If one could be secure in the knowledge that whatever the world thinks of me, there is one who believes in me and in whose love and loyalty I can always depend on. If there are fingers that are always ready to point at me, there are fingers that will twine with mine and reassure me that I'm good. That for every person who tells me that I'm worthless and full of faults, there is one person who will tell me that there's none worthier and its my faults that make me what I am, and I wouldn't be as lovable, without them. That when somebody blames me for the wrong I've done, someone will tell me that I couldn't have known it was wrong and if I did, I wouldn't have done it.

That when I feel the need to express my feelings or discuss my ideas, I know I have someone to turn to, besides my diary. That if I have a problem, I know it will no longer be mine, but 'ours' and together we will attempt to solve it.

That every gesture of mine will be rewarded with an equal gesture and not because it is expected, but as an affectionate reaction. That when my heart is heavy, the world won't know the difference, but someone does and cares.

That if something very tragic happens in my life, the pain is lesser, because I know I won't have to cry alone. There are many who will throw me a handkerchief to wipe my tears, but what comforts me is that I have a shoulder to weep on.

That people may come and go in someone's life, I've nothing to fear, because I've been promised that there will be none as dear as me.

Alas! How emotional can one be !! One tells oneself "This is the stuff that dreams are made of". One feels like a child lost in a frightening jungle, looking for its parent. Some look and find. Some look and don't. Those who do, are lucky. Those who don't, are either devoured by vicious creatures, life becomes too much for them, or they learn to survive by themselves. They find the strength, the reassurances, the comfort inside them and learn that when you expect things from others, you may be disappointed but you can always trust yourself. You may not find the friend you were looking for, but no one can be a better friend to you than yourself. Only you know what lies deep within you, and when you know how precious it is, you can only feel sorry for a "Someone" , who never found possession of it..............................